Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Overlord Legacy - Chapter Three - The Birth of Baby Overlord

The events of last night promised to be catastrophic and traumatic. Poor pregnant Bambi falling to the floor, screaming for help, trying to protect her sweet unborn baby from this creature that was once her partner in law enforcement. Then, as she backed up to the wall, trembling and sweating in fear, the door opened and in walked an ugly zombie. Such terror! Such fear! Such makings of tragedy!

...But really all that happened was this.
Partner: "Sorry, didn't mean to scare you like that. Could've gone into premature labor and all."
Bambi: "Oh, that's fine. Playing chess with werewolves is always fun."
Zombie: "When I walk in this spot, this is what I see...a whole lotta people staring at me..."

Bambi knew her husband would be coming home soon, but she's just too polite to tell anyone to leave. So when the taxi pulled in front of the house, Bambi got up and made a meal for her husband. When hungry, Rufus often didn't notice things, so she was hoping her, uh...unique guests would quietly leave while Rufus ate dinner. But, such things were not to be.
Rufus: "Uh....dear?"
Bambi: "Yes, Rufie?"
Rufus: "Why is there a werewolf and a zombie at our chess table?"
Bambi: "Well, you know, uh...werewolves and zombies, they just like to come in and...play chess from time to time. The zombie's been quite polite, really. She hasn't attempted to eat my brains at all."
Rufus: "Well, there's not enough there to make a meal of it."
Bambi: "Oh, Rufus."
Rufus: "Haven't I told you enough times to keep the door locked? It could've been the hero destined to overthrow me that just waltzed through the door. We're lucky it was just a couple of mutant freaks."

Exhausted from the evening, Bambi went straight to bed and Rufus, who is not nearly as polite as his wife, promptly batted the werewolf on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper and shooed her out of the house. The zombie, noticing Rufus had plenty of scrumptious brain matter, prepared to attack, but Rufus had work in the morning so he went to bed and left the zombie lonely and hungry. Frustrated, the zombie broke their shower, then left.

--

So that was last evening. Today looks quite promising. Our darling Bambi looks just ready to pop.
Bambi: Huh...I feel like I can see the inside on my bedroom through the walls of the kitchen.
Shut up, Bambi. The Sim Deity never took a course in photography.

Bambi has some desires to read baby books, buy rocking chairs and stuffed animals, all that cute baby stuff. Hubby has need of her in the bathroom, however. He's beckoning towards the shower...
...but not for hanky-panky, of course.
Rufus: "Would you hurry up mopping that floor? My evil blue puppy slippers are getting wet."
Bambi: "How did the shower get broken anyway? Were you trying to be manly and 'tinker' with it again?"
Rufus: "You dare question my handiness skills, woman?"
Bambi: "Honey, you don't fix showers by banging on the shower head with a wrench."
Rufus: "Everything can be fixed by hitting it hard enough."

Eventually Rufus manages to fix the shower and add a few more points to his man card, then he sits at the chess board to manage his obsession...I mean hobby. Bambi feels antsy, however, can't hold still. Finally she decides to go visit the alchemy shop up the block. Her mama always told her growing up to never dabble in "Halloween tomfoolery", but after getting over the shock of seeing a werewolf and a zombie, Bambi's a little more curious. So she decides to take a walk.

She gets right to the parking lot of the alchemy shop...and then this.
Bambi: "Ohhh...I just knew walking in sky-high heels might send me into labor! I really wanted to see that potion shop though..."

This, of course, leaves Bambi in a rather awkward position. She doesn't want to go to the hospital without her husband, but how is she supposed to tell her child someday, "Your birth was such a precious experience for me - nobody was around to help me, so you just plunked out at an alchemy shop parking lot. Hopefully you didn't hit your head too hard." So slowly, painfully, she waddles back to the house.

Bambi walks in and proceeds to strain and push.
Rufus: "Geez, Bambi. The toilet's over there."
Bambi: "No, Rufus, I'm having the baby now."
Rufus: "Oh...well then, I might as well say now I want to name the baby."
Bambi: "What do you want to name the baby?"
Rufus: "Something dark and ominous and reflective of the torture I will soon put the world in."

Bambi: "Honey, no. Our child is going to have a normal name."
Rufus: "What?! You're not even listening to me! How will the baby ever be feared as an Overlord descendent if it doesn't have a fear-inducing name?"
Bambi: "What if our child doesn't even want to be an evil overlord?"
Rufus: "Not...want to...be...an evil..overlord..!??!? FFFFUUUUUU--....no child of mine gets to be an heir unless they further the overlord legacy in some way!"
Bambi: "Honey, what are you going to do when our little one throws a tantrum like the one you're throwing now?"
Rufus: "I. WANT. TO NAME. THE BABY."
Bambi: "Okay! Okay. I trust you, Rufus. You can name the baby."
Rufus: "Okay....."
"....sighhh. Will you just have the baby already? I'm tired of waiting."
Bambi: "You could take me to a hospital, you know!"
Rufus: "I will never set foot in any establishment that's designed to help and heal people."

A few more groans...a few more strains...a few more pushes...and baby Overlord takes his first breaths of life. Yes, their first child is a boy. No telling at this point whether he looks more like his mom or his dad, but Bambi couldn't be prouder to hold her precious first child in her arms. Rufus, meanwhile, couldn't be prouder of his name selection.

Everyone, meet Dungeon Overlord.

11 comments:

  1. Oh dear Watcher, what have you done allowing these two to pro-create!? "Dungeon"... seriously? =P

    Where do I get one of those 'man cards' anyways, I have a sim who needs one!

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    1. Come now, you can't honestly have expected a normal name for Rufus Overlord's son. If it were up to Rufus, they wouldn't be procreating anyway, but none shall cross the Sim Deity's rules, not even an Overlord. :)

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  2. PS: Loved the walls-down / photog dig ;)

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  3. Omg I love this! Rufus is hilarious. You have a really funny writing voice. I also played a good/evil spouse scenario - although in my case, the woman was evil and the man was good. It's a LOT of fun. And I can't wait to see how this plays out!

    Also, Dungeon is a fantastic first name.

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  4. Rufus' tantrum was hilarious! But he chose a great name for his evil overlord heir. =D

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  5. Dungeon? I wonder how Bambi feels about her firstborn's name...

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  6. I love how you used the Sim panic dance as a temper tantrum.

    Excellent name choice, your Evil Overlordness.

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  7. Your legacy is so funny! Rufus is such a cartoony villain, I love it.

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  8. Very cute! :) Love the name Dungeon. Very appropriate name for an heir for the Evil Overlord!

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  9. That poor little baby. Rufus reminds me of Dr. Horrible. Love it!

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  10. An evil overlord always gets his way. Unless he messes with the Sim Deity. I'm interested in seeing what Dungeon will grow up to be.

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