Sunday, September 9, 2012

The Addison House - Episode Six

Welcome to a new episode of the Addison House, where eight strangers compete for $50,000 in a haunted house. We are down to our final two weeks. Let's take a look at the three contestants who are left.
Amie's dream of owning a business corporation went bust in the first week. Saki, hoping to gain fame and enough money to buy a drum set didn't work hard enough to pay off debts and went home on Week 2. Stefan, hoping to use the money to buy an outdoor resort with a bar onsite, lost his confidence and nearly his sanity in Week 3, leading to his elimination. Simerican Indian Lara wished to use the money to start her own large garden, but couldn't garner enough support to survive Week 4. Finally, hard-working Alyssa reached high for her desire for fame, but was sent home by the Immunity winner in Week 5. Three men remain in the competition - Rocco, hoping to spend the money on tons of technology for his apartment; Lucas, hoping to move out of his parents' basement; Dewayne...we're still not sure what he hopes for yet. Which of these men will reach the Final Two and face each other for $50,000?

This week is Career Week. Their career will be based on a skill they all had subconsciously been raising during their entire stay - cooking. The three contestants will work at the local bistro for a week, and the one with the most work performance at the end wins. The prize: Tiebreaker's Vote. That is, in the event of a three-way tie during voting, the Tiebreaker's Vote trumps all other votes. (This can ONLY be used in a three-way tie - if one contestant gets two votes, they are eliminated even if they have the Tiebreaker's Vote.) This could potentially be very useful - our three contestants have similar relationship levels with each other. Now then, let's send our contestants off to the work force.
This is their area of employment. Nicest freaking bistro we've ever seen, if you ask us.
Crammed into a tiny car on the way to work. And of course, being tailgated by a moron.
Dewayne: Hit the brakes! Hit the brakes!
Sorry, Dewayne, that won't work. In your universe, cars just go through each other.
Dewayne: .....Crap.
Now don't they just look adorable in their work gear?
Dewayne: I can't wait to start working! I'm starving! can't eat until dinner break, Dewayne. You're not an Ingredient Taster YET.
First day of work turned out pretty well. Dewayne and Lucas have gone straight to bed, being exhausted, while Rocco is relaxing in the hot tub. Christine Addison is still hanging around, cleaning up the place. We're STILL not comfortable with her being here.
Uh...hang on. I think I just saw that urn move. Is our ghostie friend still making mischief?
AAAGH! Asher Addison?!? You're actually a real ghost?!
Asher: Of course I am. Don't tell me you didn't pay any attention to those signs I left. I put so much effort into them.
...We didn't know what to think about those. But I guess we do now. How are you feeling?
Asher: I still feel cooked. Is Christine still on this property? She has a lot of nerve.
Asher: You. You're that science geek that said ghosts couldn't exist. Always had pillow fights in my cellar.
Rocco: Whoa!
Asher: Oh, there's Christine over there. Hey, Christine. Didn't expect you'd see me again, huh?
Christine: ...Asher? H-hi, honey.
Asher: 'Honey'? What's next, 'I love you'? Whatever. I'd ask you to kindly make me some dinner, but you'd probably try to set me on fire again. I'll go get it myself.
...And we have Christine passed out on the ground. Will someone run out there and check her pulse?...She's still breathing? Good. This is going to interesting week.
And an interesting week it certainly has been. Christine Addison fled the house shortly after waking up and hasn't returned. Let's take a look at our camera footage this week.
It appears Lucas has finally started to skinny-dip.
You just sat there and ate those waffles surrounded by flies, burnt food, and smelly dishes.
Lucas: You get used to it.
Lucas: Yeah. Haven't you ever eaten at a Del Taco?
We gave the contestants a few more rewards this week. One was a sprinkler.
Dewayne: Water feels so funny on my butt!
...You know, there's a reason no one wants to play in the sprinkler with you, Dewayne.
The boys watching TV.
TV: "I'm flying, Jack! I'm flying!"
Lucas: If I win the money, maybe I can take Alyssa on a cruise and we can do that.
Rocco: Oh no! I hope he holds onto her - she could fall over the railing!
Dewayne: What the heck? She's not really flying...
Rocco: Man, I'm so hungry. Oh look! This dish still has crumbs on it! It smells like raw sewage, but that's okay. It's best not to waste food! *lick lick lick*
Peanut butter and jelly after work. (I just think they're so adorable in their work uniforms.)
Rocco: Dewayne! I wanted to sleep in this bed!
There are five other beds available, Rocco.
Rocco: But I wanted that one!
 Hey! Look who we found coming out of the bistro!
Saki: Huh. I thought I recognized some of the workers.
Hmm. It appears Saki is being courted by an older gentleman with the last name of Shallow. Saki. Surely you can do better.

What's this? We hope Christine Addison's not purposely stalking our contestants. Don't make us send your undead husband after you, Christine.
Speaking of whom, Asher has actually been quite fun to watch. The contestants have been a little apprehensive about him, but they're warming up.
 You like this little pond, Asher?
Asher: This little quiet area was what made me decide to buy this house.
...Wait, what are you still doing outside? It's 2:00 in the afternoon. I thought ghosts went back into their urns during daylight hours, only coming out at night.
Asher: I've been stuck inside that thing for fifty years. I'm not going back in for a while.
Makes sense.
(True enough, that ghost never once went back into his urn once he came out. He was always out doing something.)
 We're quite fascinated. For a ghost, he does a lot of normal human things - like take showers, sleep, eat, and read books.
He also has a lot of fun jumping into objects and possessing them, whether they're toilets, beds, sinks, chairs, flower tubs, hair dryers, or refrigerators.
Dewayne: Hey! Quit possessing the shower and leave! I have to pee!
Aww, Dewayne, you're spoiling his fun. What else can a ghost find enjoyment in?
Lucas was the first to attempt conversation with Asher. Things went pretty well, as long as Lucas wasn't talking about himself.
Asher making some funny faces with Dewayne. Lucas is on the phone with Alyssa, apparently complaining about dirty dishes. Good to see he's still in contact with her.
Alas, the week has come to a close, and all contestants must now quit their jobs. Once again, none of the contestants broke any appliances, so Dewayne's and Rocco's Free Passes are still in use (and Lucas has managed to avoid the cellar). Meanwhile, the contestant who has earned Tiebreaker's Vote is...Lucas! Although Lucas was in a horrible mood the first couple days of work, later in the week he stopped the Sous-Chef from dropping a perfect dish on the floor and was instantly promoted. With a Level 5 in cooking skill and reaching a Level 3 in the culinary career, Lucas ran away with it.

It's time to get to the part we've all been waiting for, where we see who will make it into the Final Two. Gentlemen, take a seat on the couch, please.
Asher: What's everyone doing?
We're getting ready to eliminate a contestant....would you like to vote? I mean, it's your house and...
Asher: ...No. I know who I'd vote to eliminate, but no. Carry on.
There is no more bottom two and no more Immunity. Any one of you could be going home tonight. In the event of a three-way tie, Lucas holds the Tiebreaker's Vote.
Rocco:  I saw the Sous-Chef starting to tip that meal! I should've caught it. I should've worked harder!
Dewayne: *Klingon*
Lucas: I finally won something...not Immunity, but finally something...
I have taken your votes. I can reveal to you now....that there is NOT a three-way tie. One contestant has received the votes of the other two. The one I call to step forward is the contestant who will be leaving us tonight. Please step forward...
Dewayne: ...Really?
Yes, really, Dewayne. I'm sorry.

Our strange contestant Dewayne made an incredible run for it. Completely clashing with some contestants and getting along marvelously with others, no one could predict this guy's next move - or how far he'd go. With his surge of two Immunities in the last couple weeks, he was looking very strong, and at the beginning of the week, he held a much better relationship with Rocco than Lucas did. However, this week saw a mighty push from Lucas - he spent considerable time with Dewayne and even [I]more[/I] time with Rocco, surpassing Dewayne and becoming best friends with Rocco. If there was ever a time to make a move for the money, it was now - and Lucas made it, while Dewayne relaxed. Let's hear what Dewayne has to say:
Dewayne: Well, I certainly tried for the money. I could've used it to buy a whole library. I love books. Outside of a dog, books are a man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too hard to read.
Um....okay. Is that all, Dewayne?
Dewayne: Yes. I'll just tell all my family and friends that I won.
Well, you're a winner in our hearts, Dewayne. We'll miss you.

Tune in next week for the epic finale. Self-proclaimed geek Rocco fights for the money against cat-loving emo boy Lucas. Who will take home $50,000? See you next time.

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